You suck at SEO and you know it. You are so bad you can’t even figure out that most SEO agencies just resell $5 Fiverr gigs as their “premium” services.

Looks like you need another job, one where you will not use your brain…too much.

Let’s dive into some job options for dumb people who may not have a lot of brainpower, but still want to make some cash:

1. Garbage Man – This job is perfect for people who like to get their hands dirty, or those who have a nose that can withstand the stench of rotting garbage. As a garbage man, you’ll be responsible for picking up trash and hauling it away. It’s not the most glamorous job, but it pays well and provides job security.
2. Mailman – If you like walking around and don’t mind getting chased by dogs, then being a mailman might be a good fit for you. You’ll get to deliver letters and parcels to people’s homes and businesses, and you’ll have plenty of exercise while doing it.
3. Post Office Employee – If you prefer working indoors, then working at the post office might be a good option. You’ll be responsible for sorting and delivering mail, as well as helping customers with their postal needs. Just don’t get too excited and start reading other people’s mail!
4. Customer Service – If you enjoy talking to people and don’t mind dealing with angry customers, then working in customer service might be a good fit. People talking to you will probably be as stupid as you are. Just remember to keep your cool when dealing with Karen.
5. Enlist with a Ruling Party – If you’re interested in politics and want to make a difference (put some money in your pocket), then enlisting with a ruling party might be a good option. You’ll be able to push your way through the ranks and potentially make a difference in your local community or even at a national level. Not really. You’ll get to wear fancy suits and pretend like you know what you’re doing.
6. Truck Driver – If you enjoy driving and don’t mind being on the road for long periods of time, then being a truck driver might be a good fit. You’ll be responsible for transporting goods across the country, and you’ll have plenty of time to listen to audiobooks along the way.
7. Assembly Work – If you’re good with your hands and enjoy working with tools, then assembly work might be a good option. You’ll be responsible for putting together products or machinery in a factory setting. Plus, you can pretend like you’re building a giant robot that will take over the world!

So go out and optimize your career. Or, read that first paragraph again and fake it till you make it.